Help...just got a 2nd Frenchie who doesn't like my Winston

[yomshanti]

Hi guys! I'm hoping you can help me! I have a 2 1/2 year old brindle boy, Winston. He is a very easy-going, friendly neutered boy. I say this honestly because he and I went to Frenchie Fun Camp last summer and he got along with every one of the dogs there. He doesn't have an agressive bone in his little body. Anyway, I've been wanting to add onto our family and found a wonderful breeder in Tennessee who was retiring one of her older girls, Lucy (5 years old). The breeder and I talked at great length before I made the decision to get Lucy. She told me Lucy is an alpha momma but that she got along with all her Frenchies, both males and females. I will preface that this breeder is wonderful and told me that if it did not work out with Winston, she would take Lucy back.

To make a long story short, I drove to get Lucy this past weekend and brought her home to Arlington Heights, Illinois, where Winston and I live. I took them outside on a leash with a coupler to have them meet on "neutral" territory and let them sniff one another. Winston has tried to befriend Lucy, but she has vacillated between ignoring him or getting in his face, growling and snapping at him. I am quite concerned. I called the breeder and she said to "give it time." I told her that Winston's breeder said that they should be romping and playing by now and if they haven't started doing so, it's not a good sign. Lucy's breeder doesn't share this opinion.

So, I'm asking all of you for your help and advice, as I know many of you have more than one Frenchies. Lucy is a sweetie with me, very affectionate, but I really want Winston to have a buddy. What do you recommend me doing to help them make the transition? I really want this to work out. It would break my heart to have to send her back.

Thanks in advance. I look forward to hearing back from you.

Diane

[French Queen]

Hi Diane - it's hard to say without seeing the dogs whether it's a normal adjustment period or she really doesn't like him. The fact is some dogs don't click no matter how much training you do. If you live near to the breeder, take the dogs so she can asses them together, see what she thinks.

You have to remember you took Lucy away from the only home she has ever known & placed in a totally new environment, new people & a new dog, give her more time to adjust. All you can do is supervise & let them sort themselves out, always stay calm, only intervene if a major fight occurs & they wont stop. If you think Lucy is going to have a go at Winston distract her with something that will make a loud noise, this should stop her in her tracks, calmly take her away from the situation. The trouble is you don't always have something at hand to use, I found wearing a whistle around my neck was very effective for one of my girls. The one thing you must not do is to make a grab for Lucy if you think she is going to have a go, this will defiantly start a fight. Always make sure Winston can get away from her, they both need their own space, use crates or a baby gate to restrict them. My only concern is if she doesn't adapt & is constantly snapping at him, he may turn on her, the best natured dog will only take so much, you don't want to ruin his temperament.

I have brought in a few adults in the past, some click straight away, while others can take a few months for their true characters to show. As long as they know that I'm the Boss, I let them sort themselves out. My resident dogs would always come before an aggressive dog especially a new arrival.

Hope it all works out for you all

French Queen & the little clowns :)

[yomshanti]

Hi. Things are getting better on the homefront. Less tussles between Lucy and Winston. He keeps trying to get near her to hump her (!) and will even hump the air, which is funny. Sometimes when she approaches him he gets a scared look in his eyes, but I've noticed the two of them running after each other upstairs in my townhouse...so, I'd say they are progressing.

I know I have to stay calm and give them time. In the meantime, thanks for writing.

Diane

[louie's mom]

Hi Diane, I just read your posts- I am glad things are getting better! We also had an adjustment period when we brought a second male a little over a year old in to our home. Louie our first frenchie was a little over 1-1/2. Chester the new guy was really scared- he was away from the only home he knew and was really nasty to Louie at first. I also called the breeder and wondered if we needed to give up on the whole idea!! However- as Chester began to trust this new home and his place here - they have become good friends!! I would say it took a good 6 months for both of them to adjust. Food was always the big issue- now they will sleep together and they play all the time!!! It really did not look good at first- I hope you will have the same experience!! Good luck!! Please keep me posted!!!
Karla

[French Queen]

Hi Diane- I so pleased things are working, I had my fingers crossed for you. Winston has to learn some manners, that's no way to treat a lady :lol: You must stop him from humping her. Be firm with him & say NO or distract him, put him outside or in a crate to cool off. If he is allowed to keep doing it, Lucy might go for him & that would be a real shame considering the way things are going between them.
I don't play games with my males as this tends to make them (get fruity) even more, I calmly remove them from the room. Good Luck

French Queen & the little clowns :)

[yomshanti]

Can someone tell me why the heck he wants to hump her? Is it sexual or just demonstrating that he was there first/an alpha thing? He keeps going back and trying it, despite her body language that he'd better not try anything!

Things are definately improving...I have seen her lick him, which she never would have done a week ago. She is extremely possessive of her things and tends to go after things of his. I put down two hooves for them to chew on. Each started on his/her own, then Winston must have taken a break from chewing, and she took his! When he went to go get it back, she got in his face! I always break up these incedents. In fact, when Lucy gets aggressive with him, I lay her on her side and do the whole Cesar Milan, Dog Whisperer thing. Hopefully, it's working.

Now onto housebreaking...Lucy's breeder had told me she was almost trained, but I've seen her peeing on the carpet and now, Winston's doing it too! Help! How can I stop this? I'm renting a condo and can't afford the damage...I welcome any and all advice.

Diane

[louie's mom]

Chester. our second frenchie took a little while to get the potty thing down but that sorted itself out after a few weeks. As far as the treats and chews! When I buy something new- bone, toy or realy anything- I buy 3- and I watch them until they have explored all 3. At first however - it was awful!!! It always looked as though a war would break out!! Now - they both seem to understand that I would never give one something without giving the other one the same- so scrambles for a dropped cracker do not happen anymore! For me- making sure they both understood that fairness made all the difference. I just kept reminding myself that Chester had to learn the security that Louie always had! It has been fun to watch him make this his home- he is so relaxed and floppy now- he was not that way for a good while!! He is a big part of our family now- even though Louie still believes he is in charge of all!! It sounds like your 2 want to like each other so hang in there!

[French Queen]

Hi Diane - As for humping I think in Winston's case he is trying to assert himself & figure out what pecking order to fit into when Lucy is around. Stop him as soon as you see him trying it on; redirect him on to something else of interest.

As for chews be firm with her remember your the boss & say NO when she goes to get his chews, if she keeps taking them from him he may retaliate. Redirect her attention to something else when she tries to take his chews, trouble is frenchies are so nosey I would imagine Winston would come running too, to see if he was missing out on something. Sometimes they are so obsessed to possess others toys/chews you may have to face the fact dogs like Lucy who are extremely possessive cannot be left with chews when there is another dog on the scene, no matter how hard you try to make it work. When a second or third frenchie arrives, chews/toys become more of an issue with a lot of them. If Lucy is like two of mine, I dont think it would make any difference if you had put twenty chews down, she would still take them all, she doesn't want them & she is going to make dam sure Winston isn't going to have them either. Put Lucy in a crate with hers the problem with having one in a crate the other dog sometimes teases the other, or put them both in a separate crate. If you have a child gate separate the sitting room from the kitchen & leave the door open, so they can still see you, keep one in with you & the other in the kitchen, they can chew to their hearts content, the problem with this is the one not with you tends to stand at the gate waiting for you to let them back in. All you can do is try & see what happens. Some of mine will play happily together, Jade & Samara will not, they have theirs on their own, that's the way it will stay, they dont play with theirs, the only satisfaction these two would get out of toys/chews is to steal them from the others, that would never happen. I always make sure I dont give them any reason for fighting.

A healthy bitch that is not fully housetrained at five yrs old, it make you wonder.
Think of her as a ten wk old pup, start house training from scratch, dont just let her out, go with her & watch her, when she goes praise her & give her a treat. Lucy can hold her bladder but she needs to be taught where to empty it. If she uses the same area in your house as a toilet, it will smell like a toilet to her, even if it doesn't to you, clean the area thoroughly, dont use anything containing ammonia, to dogs this smells like wee. Ignore any accidents indoors, if you catch her in the act tell her firmly NO & take her out, take Winston too, if you dont he will probably wee on top of hers while your out with Lucy. Don't give her free run of the house; confine her to one room until you get the problem sorted out which could take a long time with an adult. I dont think you will stop Winston from weeing in the house until you sort Lucy out, there are a few reasons why he is doing this, covering up her scent, to make things smell familiar or making sure his property stays his, if you catch him at it tell him off.

Good Luck

French Queen & the little clowns :)

[bulldoggin30]

We frenchy-sat for Paisley, our cousin's 5 year old female this past week. Everything you are describing happened to us! Paisley would take her bone (I had 2 sets of two) and hide it, then wait for Dutchie to leave his and go chew it! And Dutchie would hump her and when I told him "no", he would also hump the air! My friend said he looked like an accordian! :lol: Then she would turn around and hump him! :eek: They kept me entertained but it's kinda nice to have things back to normal now. :)

[yomshanti]

Well, they are doing well, although Lucy doesn't really interact with him. She lays next to him and they will occasionally lick one another, but as far as "playing" she just isn't interested! It makes me kind of sad because I'd wanted a playmate for him...but this may change.

Now for the humping. She has established herself as "alpha" and seems to let him try and when she has enough, she'll give him the message to stop. A few days ago I actually saw her lift her tush in the air as if saying, "just try it." I couldn't believe it! My breeder says to just let him if she doesn't mind, but I wonder. What do you think?

Anyway, the potty re-training is going well. They are consistently peeing and pooping outside. I just need to be vigilant.

Thanks for all your input
Diane

[French Queen]

Diane - they can be little tarts flaunting their bits in front of the males, it's a case of you can look but dont touch the merchandise, distract her; it's not fair on the male getting him all excited then proceeds to snap at him when he tries it on. I know it's not funny but to see the male's reaction is priceless, they are frozen to the spot & the eye;s move slowly from side to side as if he was figuring out what to do next & why doesn't she love him any more!

As for a playmate it may never happen, it's down to personality, the main thing is they get on; some just prefer the companionship & remember it's early days yet, she may surprise you. They seem happy with the way things are at the moment so don't worry, they aren't. My alpha bitch doesn't play much, it's usually a five min session & that's her limit, she prefers to sit & observe & keep her house in order but most of the lower ranking dogs play together especially the young ones.

As for humping Bulldoggin said it was entertaining but it was nice to have things back to normal & that was in a week. Once the five min entertainment value has gone it becomes a real pain. Stop him or let him carry on but you cant have it both ways; you will totally confuse the dog.

French Queen & the little clowns :)